I got an e-mail from my proposed supervisor for next year, telling me that she does not get funding for me. Sadly, department policies prohibit students without internal or external grants to pursue grad studies. She referred me to a colleague but I already talked to that woman a couple of months ago (because she was the one I originally wanted to work with) and she only takes on bilingual or Francophone students. Which is of course understandable, on practical as well as fairness grounds. Sadly, for me it means that I'm as good as rejected from McGill.
This not only means that I have lost another school (and the safest bet, too), but also that I'll likely have to pack my things in June and leave Montreal. Fuck. This city means so much to me, I cannot imagine being away for more than 2 weeks, not taking the overheated metro, not ordering coffee in broken French, not having a fridge that's empty except for a half-full bottle of maple syrup, not having poutine at 4 am.
All the friends that I made and all the quirks of this wonderful city that I learned to love... :(
I don't wanna leave.