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Me, myself and I

It's just not that simple.

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Il ne reste plus que 4 mois...
general: pardon my french
 I should tell you about all the amazing things I've seen in Singapore (and *oooh* Malaysia for one day) during these lest couple of days. And I will, with pics and all, once I get back home. And, ah, there's the rub. Home.

I got an e-mail from my proposed supervisor for next year, telling me that she does not get funding for me. Sadly, department policies prohibit students without internal or external grants to pursue grad studies. She referred me to a colleague but I already talked to that woman a couple of months ago (because she was the one I originally wanted to work with) and she only takes on bilingual or Francophone students. Which is of course understandable, on practical as well as fairness grounds. Sadly, for me it means that I'm as good as rejected from McGill.

This not only means that I have lost another school (and the safest bet, too), but also that I'll likely have to pack my things in June and leave Montreal. Fuck. This city means so much to me, I cannot imagine being away for more than 2 weeks, not taking the overheated metro, not ordering coffee in broken French, not having a fridge that's empty except for a half-full bottle of maple syrup, not having poutine at 4 am.
All the friends that I made and all the quirks of this wonderful city that I learned to love... :(

I don't wanna leave.

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Hmm.. I know such a feeling. I think we all do. Leaving everything you know behind for too long feels like you lost something precious, something you always take for granted, but somehow means something in you life. :(

I hope you'll never have to leave the city you love, my dear.

*hugs you*

*hugs* back! (even though belated)

Btw, have you ever been to Burma? And if so, did you have trouble getting a visa? I'm in the process of figuring this out right now but I'm not sure if it'll be better to first go to Burma and then to Thailand because I heard that the guys at the Burmese border are not happy to let in people with a stamp from Thailand...

That sucks. I'm sorry to hear that. Are there any other chances/options? What else are you looking into?

Would have posted earlier, but wasn't sure if you'd want to hear from me just now. But I do still care, all the same.

Hmmm... there are still a couple of apps out there. PhD apps to Harvard, NYU and Nijmegen (Netherlands), Masters in Virginia. And I can always apply further to LSE and other schools in UK. It's just tiring and frustrating. And I'm losing my referees... and my school in Germany is not willing to send copies of my transcript. All a bit bad these days.

And no worries... I do care, too. :)

Hmm. Good luck.

(And if you're around NYU and have some time, I'd be pleased if you'd drop me a line. If you feel like it. No telling if I'll be awake and around, of course. But still... it'd be cool if something worked out.)

Sorry you're dealing with it all, though. Sounds like a mess. Wish I could do more than offer best wishes.

As for the last... Thank you. :)

Yep, I'll let you know for sure.

Actually, NYU might be the one school where I actually have a shot (although they want all internationals to report their TOEFL (Test of English as a Foreign Language) results... even if you're from UK or, say, Canada :P - and I didn't do that), they're not that highly ranked in Social Sciences and sometimes admit unsuccessful PhD applicants into the Masters program... we'll see.

Awwww . . . I hope you find some way to stay.

Yeah, me too... I keep telling myself that it's not over yet... but just looking really bad... not super comforting.

But of course the biggest worry right now is getting in somewhere at all... But, ya know, positive thinking :)

*hugs* Hope it all works out for the best, whatever that means ♥

Thankies! I hope so, too.... we'll see. I'm waiting to hear from other schools these days, so maybe there's gonna be something in there for me at some other place.

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